Birth of an Artist
Salto Mortale – Leap into the Void
As I laid on my back facing the ceiling of the maloca, my legs whipped back and forth under my brown tweed blanket. Across the room, a friend, deep in their own journey, caught a glimpse of me — an upside down turtle stuck on its shell, desperately trying to gain its footing.
***
The pandemic and the unexpected death of a co-worker had caused a seismic shift in my perspective. The tragic and sudden loss was a wake-up call that life was too short to live miserably. I realized nothing would change unless I changed it myself. I set out on a journey to find what was missing in my life.
After months of writing music and meditating, a calling to sit in spiritual retreat in the jungle of Central America overtook me. I didn’t know why, but I knew I had to answer.
Sawubona – I See You
In the jungle, I found a place within myself I’d only touched briefly before through deep mediation — the place where the illusion of separation melts away, where the voice within is clear and cuts through the noise of day-to-day life. The place where the arbitrary walls I’d built to protect my egoic sense of self crumbled through my fingers like desert clay.
Ngikhona – I am Here
Through months of meditation, a new discipline set in. A discipline of connecting deeply with myself and with others, a discipline in which the ego would take a back seat and the art that was ready to travel through me would no longer play second fiddle. I would answer the call no matter where it took me and trust the intuitive guidance that had never let me down.
I got back to work - toiling in the studio for hours on end through the nights. Days turned into months and months turned into years as I dove deeper into the endless abyss. A meditation master’s words rang like a mantra:
The bad news is, you’re falling through the air, nothing to hang on to, no parachute.
The good news is, there is no ground.
In that void I found voice and expression. I finally understood what Rumi meant when he said you are not a drop in the ocean, you are the ocean in a drop.
And, finally, I felt like I’d rocked off my shell, back onto my feet.
***
Meditation Mondays
Every Monday, I send out “Meditation Mondays” – short emails with thoughts and quotes that are inspiring me.
The goal of each Mediation Monday is to share these ideas with you in the hopes that you’ll find some inspiration in them as well. Take what resonates with you and leave the rest behind.
